What did the grape do after it was stepped on? Nothing, as it was incapacitated, and even under normal circumstances, it would be incapable of performing any voluntary actions as it is only a grape.

whos the biggest oaf................................ coasta

Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

How long did it take the world's most powerful democracy to elect a black President? Less than a day.

Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

whats 69+2? 71

how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

penis

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

an athiest walks into a church

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

Jimmy was skipping in the park one day when a young boy stopped him. "Hello there, would you like to be friends? We can go behind the old oak tree and play soccer!" asked the boy. "Ok!" replied Jimmy, and they went off together to play. The so-called 'young boy' was actually a wanted midget rapist. Jimmy was brutally raped and filmed. The film was later uploaded onto the internet where it blew up in a matter of weeks. Jimmy had to move schools 6 times and had to go to counselling every week. He finds it hard making friends and later went on to become a heavy cocaine addict.

how do u keep a stupid person in suspense? how

i feel like i will die some heroic death, but its more likely i will trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

Women's rights

what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

why did the blond walk in to a door because she was not paying attention

Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

Q:Why did the man have a lot of Hoes? A: He was an experienced Agriculturalist.

A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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