- Anti Joke

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

What's the difference between a bomb and a muslim? Nothing. The difference is only apparent. At the fundamental basic building blocks of the universe, everything is made up of quarks.

Roses are red Violets are orange Thats odd, my violets are somehow orange

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

Knock Knock. Who's there? Shit... Shit who? Wrong house... Do I know you Shitt Ronghouse? Yes. Please come in. Okay.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

Hey. I have to ask you a serious question. Okay. what? You can only answer with yes or no. Okay what is it? Do your parents know your gay? .....

What do you call a black guy robbing a store ? A theif

2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

Why are rich guys gay? They can afford to be

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Knock Knock Who's There? It's Me. Oh, OK. Come On In.

What's worse than a bee sting? Getting shot in the head

What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

PENIS

Hi

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.