Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

In Soviet Russia... People Die for Voicing their Opinions

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

What's worse then breaking your xbox? Going on a 24 kill streak and having itchy balls.

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

How can you tell an Irishman from a frenchman? Well, if you look back at both there heritages...

Is J.P. dumb? Yes

Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

Why was the Mexican smart? Because he was very well educated and went to college, and got a Ph.D

What did the bowl of cereal say? Can I have some milk?

two men walked into a bar the last one ducked

A guy walks in to a bar, waving a gun around. He acidentally shoots himself in the foot He died from the bloodloss.

"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

What's 9+10? 19

Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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