What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the poll booth to vote on a law restricting the questioning of chickens destination and furthermore to let chickens cross with out ridicule.

Your grandma's cookies.

A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

Whats 10-5(45+76)? please help my homework is due next class and i am currently to busy worrying about my dad's cancer to think about this problem.

Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head under water until water gets into her lungs and she cant breathe.

You know whats worse than finding 3 dead children in your house? Finding 2 dead children in your house.

What would Jesus do? Something worthy of having him nailed to a cross.

I have a joke. Okay, tell me. Just kidding

Why doesn't little billy eat his vegetables at the dinner table... Because billy has bin dead for 3 years

Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

"knock knock" "Come in"

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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