If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

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What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

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Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

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There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

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What does the cookie monster and the blue man group have in common? They are both homosexually active

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A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

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why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 is bigger.

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Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops