What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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whats a willy? -brock

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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What happened to Kurt Cobain? He committed suicide. He shot himself in the head with a shotgun and then he died.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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What do u call a banana? A banana......

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What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

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What is the defference between an apple and a banana? Horses, because vests have no sleeves.

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Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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What did the black man say to the asian? Hey.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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