we all know sammi has a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

thumb_up thumb_down +13

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is Islam the fastest growing religion? Because black people breed like rats.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black man walking home in the dark after a long day at work? His name you racist

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red Violets are blue i cant ryme or spell.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops