What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? Nothing. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said objects are, are in no way capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

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a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

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You're so stupid, you had to take part in special classes in school, and despite this specific attention to your educational development, you've made no major progress.

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because Suzy had no arms.

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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