Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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Farmers are outstanding in their fields

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

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What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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What did the suicide bomber say on new years day? Happy new year.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion. What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant scorpions

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That's what she didn't say

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why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

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A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Q: How does a chicken get to work? A: A chicken does not go to work. Chickens can not legally be employed for any position in any country as they are chickens, are not human, and do not posses any prerequisites required to be hired for any existing employable position.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Why did the boy in a wheelchair cry? His mum just got shot in front of his eyes.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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TIMMAH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops