why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

*Pretend your an orphan] Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

Why did the tree stay home from school? Because, trees don't have school.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

What do you call a puppy that has been left in the cold? A puppsicle

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not having an apple to find a worm im

Knock Knock Come in.

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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