Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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OK. so a guy walks up to another guy and says hi. The other guy said nothing. The other guy said hi again. The guy said nothing The guy got really mad and slapppeed him across the face. Finally the man said PURPLE RABBID COMPUTER TREES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walked away while liking his blue brick.

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Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

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Knock knock Who's there? Your brother My brother who? The dead guy over there.

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why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

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learn the ropes?

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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What did the apple say to the orange? The apple did not say anything at all because fruits do not possess the ability of speech.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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What does a Jewish man do when he sees a new car? Doesn't buy it because he puts his money in a fund.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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What is worse than The Holocaust? That's a difficult question to answer. The term "worse" is highly subjective. It really all depends on your own personal experiences, your ethnicity, and cultural background.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops