What do you call a man with a fork stuck in his head? A man with a fork stuck in his head

Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

Why don't I understand myself? Because I am an anti-joke and lack a self-aware existence.

Why does Jordan Abu aita have a small pepe? Because he is black

How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

What's the difference between a white baby and a black baby? 10 minutes in the microwave.

what do u call a black man a black man

What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

Chantelle, I loved you, but you cheated with Johnathan from Church...

What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman is a superhero and the other is just a normal person.

What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...