If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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Why was seven afraid of eight? Because eight nine ten.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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Patients: Whats happening doctor Doctor: I am afraid you all have tested positive Patients: Oh No!!! Doctor: Positive for being great friends all these years! Patients: Oh Doctor you are so.... Doctor: ASWELL AS AIDS!!!

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Why did the mean have to clean up the mass amount of dead bodies? Because he lost a game of rock-paper-scissors.

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Knock Knock, Who's Theres? Your dead squashed nan

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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There are two men waiting in line at the supermarket. One of the men reaches forwards and taps the other one on the shoulder. He says, "You dropped your wallet.". He picks up his wallet and both of the men continue on with their day.

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A man trips on an old bottle. He picks it up and out pops a genie. "I will grant you three wishes!" says the genie. "Whatever you so desire is my com--" "I'm already late for a meeting!" shouts the man. He drops the bottle and continues on.

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Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

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A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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what do you call someone who hates jews anti semitic

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WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? roger rabbit while hilarious, was an idiot and framed himself....mind F***.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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How are bananas and friends alike? If you peel their skin and eat them

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops