A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 murdered her little sister

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Horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The horse unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? Nothing at all, except the WNBA is professional basketball players of the female sex.

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So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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Brian finally kissed a girl on the lips... After her daily whore shift of blowjobs -Ap

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What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

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A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? AIDS

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Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

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A man walks into a bar and says he has a talking dog. He is then taken to a mental hospital and diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

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Q. Why can't Stevie wonder read? A. Because he is black

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my gave me a game i said thank you

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Did you hear about the guys who wanted to go to Hawaii??? They didn't go!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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