Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

why did the boy and girl go under the covers together? because they were cold

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

knock knock whos there open the door and find out

An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

charlie sheen losing

I had sex with my mother in law

whats dead and gone your nanas cat

Hey

What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Why do they call you the interrup... SHUT UP!

Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

What do you call a person with no legs and an eyepatch? Names.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

Mark Twain, Jesus, and Bill Gates are sitting at a bar. Someone messed with the space time continuum again.

why is 6 afraid of 7 its not, they actually have a domestic partnership going

Why is Michael J. Fox unable to build domino chains? He only has one domino.

What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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