A guy walks into a bar... Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red Violets are blue get down or i will shoot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops