Knock Knock Who's There? Jerry Jerry Who? Jerry Sandusky, I've come to rape your kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock Knock knock Knock knock I have outsimers Wait why am i here?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

thumb_up thumb_down +26

If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

thumb_up thumb_down +26

heyy emit chase wazzup

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Some people like melon and others like soup.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Where is the last place you would find a Mexican? In a good hiding spot that you didn't think of while trying to find him.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A boy bought a dozen roses, eleven real, one fake. He looks deeply into his girlfriends eyes, hers looking back, brimming with love and affection as he says, "I slept with your sister."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

thumb_up thumb_down +22

One time I masturbated by myself

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops