~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Fart

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where's Waldo? Six feet under.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did the dead cat say to the dead dog? Nothing, they're dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the cow jump over the moon ? This is a highly unlikely situation , therefore the cow did not leave its humble pasture , let alone talk english while in the midst of jumping over a planet wich takes days to fly over .

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Jimmy wet his pants in class during geography class. The teacher asked: "Oh Jimmy, why did you do that?" Jimmy answered: "I don't know" Everyone laughed at him and Jimmy went home very sad. And with wet pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Because she has down's syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +14

(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops