How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

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Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

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What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

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Laugh

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Knock Knock Who's there? Reality, we have come to install a doorbell.

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

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Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

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How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

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Q: why did the blind man walk off the bridge? A: because he was blind.

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i knew this one arab, who was so arab that there was nothing funny about him

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Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish

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Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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