- Anti Joke

Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

Why is the sky blue? As the light from our Sun shines into the atmosphere, most of the colors are able to reach the Earth’s surface uninterrupted. However, because blue light has a wavelength that is the same size as the particulates in the air, this light is scattered in every direction. This blue light bounces from particulate to particulate until it eventually reaches your eyes. For this reason, no matter what direction you look in the sky, it appears to be blue. This blue light originated with the Sun, was bounced around in the sky many times, and then eventually reached your eyes.

How do you make a bull angry? Light it on fire

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

Are you a tree

What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We're all equal in the eyes of God.

What's the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies? You can't unload a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

No, what you are saying, is that you have lost hope, one of the fundamental rules in creating such a society, is becoming the kind of person, in our case a man that has a notion of free will, the willpower to follow his own vision, the kind of man with a ideology so strong that it defies the rules imposed upon us by society. Then, you do neither go around breaking said rules, nor as you do, seek out people. No, if your ideology is better, stronger and greater than what society has imposed upon us since birth, then those we consider the strong, will seek people like us. You know the basics, humans as a whole are "monkey see monkey do", but for me at least, people of true value, do not follow others, but their own belief, values concepts of life and whatnot, this is the reason I from time to time come here and "Humiliate myself", people hate my guts, I know it, acknowledge it, until it fazes me no more, then every so often a few people like it. And there you got the core of what you are conveying, individuality based on self respect and respect for others, those people that sought people like me, had this value down at heart. Again that is not something you can teach others, how to think for themselves, no. You know how it is, we live in a society where people that love themselves and respect their own work are looked down upon by others, until many decide it is not worth the effort. And if that is what society has created, then you going around promising others a better lifestyle trough following their "heart", is just going to either have them abuse you, or worse, worship you. If you succeed at having people see you as a goddamn God, then it only takes a fucking generation, your fucking lifetime, before someone takes over, starts passing on drugs or alcohol, and claiming you where a God, and then you wasted your whole life into conveying something greater, but ended up creating what people like us hate, a religion indoctrination that destroys the human part that is able to think for itself and respect its own decisions. The problem with free will, is that you can also freely surrender it, and when the so called "greatest nation on the world" are war "in the name of God" against Satan, while the other is fighting for Allah, against, SHATAM... Then it should not take much more than a monkey to figure out humanity is simply fighting one another, in this case probably over a fucking translation error. And if this is what the world most powerful nation can offer, while their elitism assures that politicians live as kings, while the people suffer, all while "Gods nation" cannot even win a war over what is considered "camels and stones" Then you should know that there is still much hope, that people such as us can start even the smallest spark, of a better society, and that people will seek us out. But our kind cannot be made, only unmade, it is easy to surrender one`s personal values and become someone else. And when you claim to be me, and spread your weird values on a fucking anti-joke side on the worlds most broken site, then what is really left of you? And if you cannot stand against the tide, then what different is what you convey, that to what the mainstream media, politicians and religion spread? Moral: Get ready for a load of thumbs downs, people most have surrendered their values and free will, its hard to stand against the tide, but as long as people such as I and hopefully you stand strong, even if in seclusion, then we only need to ignite the spark in our equals in order to succeed, and we might be few, but together and as individuals strong, we can never truly be defeated.

split your ass cheek

What's 9+10 20+1-1-1+2-1-1+1-2+1

a man says "whats shakin bakin" to a friend, but his friend was shaking, because he often has seizures... thats what was shakin

What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

What did the white father tell his mexicon son and his wife as he left for work bye

Womens rights

Why did Princess Diana die? Because she deserved it!

Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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