whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

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you know what ice cream's made out of, right? milk.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

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What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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whats the differences between an atari and a xbox 360 i don't know i'm not a video game nerd

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Q: Why are black people afraid of Chainsaws? A: Because it could kill them as it could any other individual.

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religion

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What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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Q:Why Did the Black people die in there car A: They were Homeless

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why did the plane crash? because fenton was driving it..."THE DEER HAD TO DIE"

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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A girl and a boy where sitting on a couch together. The boy told the girl politly that she hass gained a significant amount of weight and should lose it. She then pulled out a candy bar in her back pocket and shoved it down his throat, to which he suffocated, because she was on her period when to comment was made.

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titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

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Why did the fish swim away from the boat when the fishermen put him back in the water? Because he obviously wasn't gonna get back in the boat.

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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A monkey and his owner walk into a bar they sit down at the bar... I dont know the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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