Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

Q:Why did the man throw his clock out the window A:Because he didn't like his clock

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

Q: what is green, red, white, on fire, in space A: i dont know you tell me

Why did the man fall down? Because he was pushed of a 5 story building

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

Every time you log on to a porn site, somewhere a panda cub explodes. BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY. SAVE THE PANDAS.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue This poem makes no sense Trampoline

Your mom.

Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

There are two cows standing in a wide, green field eating hay. The first cow says: "Moo". The second cows says: "Thats funny, I was about to say that."

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

chuck norris can round house kick reasonably well

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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