What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? She had no arms. Knock ,Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

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Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? ... ... He committed suicide for the simple reason that the soviet and allied forces were closing in on him and he knew that he did not stand a chance of winning the war.

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What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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What was the last thing Batman said to Robin before they got in the Batmobile Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what happen to covietz when he licked his balls? nothing he likes the taste

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Autism speaks but not really

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*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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what time is it? 3:16

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter ponder with cheese.

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What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops