Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

what's the last thing you want to hear during surgery? your wife complaining

Whats the difference between a Black man and a White man Skin color and possibly many other things because that is reasonable and normal.

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

Where do cows go for entertainment? Nowhere, most are slaughtered, processed, and eaten by humans.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

How are people and jelly beans similar? No one likes the black ones

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

josh roberts got the d in geog

Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

[Insert dumb, last minute anti-joke here]

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

What happened after jimmy cheated on a test. Jimmy went home.

Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

Sometimes sentences just don't end the way that you think they potato

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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