While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Why did the woman lie down? She was dead

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Yo momma is so stupid when she drove to Disney World she saw that said "Disney World Left" so she turned on her turn signal and made a left turn. She promptly arrived at Disney World but realized she had left her wallet at the hotel.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? It fell.

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Q:What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A: A pilot you racist jerk...

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What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

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How did the gay guy greet the other gay guy? Nice to meet you.

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Why did the old woman fall down She got shot

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what is worse than finding a worm in your apple being tricked by your best friend to mule drugs over the boarder and then imprisoned in a Vietnamese jail, where you will most likely will be traded for sex and other horrid act of sodomy, only to escape and work as a sex slave to earn your way home, because that is the life you know now there is no way out you will die here.

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Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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Q: What's the difference between a duck? A: An orange.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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