What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

What's the difference between? Your mom.

PENIS

A man walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar, and he fractures his skull on it. He died in the hospital a few hours later

What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

Whats white and can talk? Snow, i lied about the colour

A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad seen that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

What's yellow and goes up and down? A banana in an elevator.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

What's worse than a kid being bullied at school? A kid being bullied at school, to go home and be raped by his stepdad.

Your mom is so poor, she can't afford nice clothing.

Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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