Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why was the giraffes head so far away from his body? because he has a long neck

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I had a date. She was a pegasister. Since MLP was magical, I disappeared.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A blonde, red head and brunette decide the jump off a cliff....... They all die

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did God say on the 7th day? -zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

thumb_up thumb_down +13

this is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops