What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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What's pink and shaped like a V? A pink V.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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What did the serial killer eat for breakfast? You.

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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Why did the student go to university? To pursue a higher education.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was something of interest on the other side.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

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Why did the

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Your mother is so ugly that she looks like you.. :)

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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roses are red, violets are blue, tom cruise is gay

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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What's black and white and roams the sea floor? A zebra.

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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