Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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go up to some one and say "i told you it would happen" with a straight face and walk away. it should cause a LOT of confusion.

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quik reply fuckker, im at the room on the left at the uh... forgot anywayss third floor, to the end of the hospital, btw, I told The Goat and Fingern to wait for you at the entrance, and I paid them to kick your ass... WHOS YOUR DADDY! Well soon ill be your dad and the father of your sisters first kid! Man, relax, I told them to just drag you outside and kick you in the nuts, then some atomixc elbows and make u bleed... Your suufering is none of use of me if your ded, plz reply abut your sufferage when they are done, u really think id fight your dirty shit yourself? I AM THE LEADer THE ONE WHO KNOcKS! I DONT LIKE THE FIGHT! PEOPLE FIGHT FOR ME! IN MY NamEN MY GLORY!! Amen, you will soon become an uncle... Nah, tell your sis its a joke, I already told her I insist bangign her look at the pone Goat has in his poket, her last responz is "now?" and two smileys with eyes poppingg XD Seriously, if they are not already kicking your ass... Well, they sent me a pic, I suppose you will end up at the hospital too, looks bad kid... But you know the goat, that kid wants to kill, and probably has... ill let theem know that if thhhhey kill youu, they hmmm... then I cantt beat you um mysepf, so no killins in my name, reelas ill call em, but you are just bruise now, I want moar blood. Nero Metal, the coldest leader, of the universe. (dat tok like 6 mins to tyype so wort it, if you diee, i dont responsible for the goat, but i think finger will stop him zoon.

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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What's funnier than seeing a baby falling from the empire state building? Stopping his speed with a shovel

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Which is longer? A rope...

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

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hi

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Everything.

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why is georgia shit at making jokes i dont know

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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Five men walk into a bar. The bartender says, more taste or less? None of them care.

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BOTTOM!!!

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holocaust is bad but its funny when you use it as a joke hehe

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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knock knock who's there i lost my wallet my nan died

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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