Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

Why did John fall down the stairs? Because John is a paraplegic and is incapable of going to down stairs without aid.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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