Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

What's worse than farting in a silent class room? Denying it and farting a second time.

What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Penis!

Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? When a child gets raped every night by its father.

What's funnier than 68 69

knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

A panda walks into a bar... Psht. Panda in a bar, that's impossible.

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

Two black men walk into a strip club. They immediately walk out because they have faithful wives at home nurturing their beautiful African children.

A Russian who dosen't like vodka

What's the difference between a rhino and a house cat? They look way different.

Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

What happens when a guy walk into a school and shoots kids? Oh sorry, to soon?

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...