Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

*you're

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

8================================================================================================D-------------------------------------------- It can coil!

Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

God has lived since the eternal eternity right? And one day he said let there be light? NO WONDER HE IS SUCH A NEEDY GREEDY EVIL FUCK! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL AFTER AEONS ENDLESS IN TOTAL DARKNESS? Moral: It is time for the prince, to stand up as the emperor, then no one shall doubt the power of the moral man.

What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

a man said hi.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

Whats worse than a rotten tomato. a fridge hitting your baby.

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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