(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

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There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a cannibal and like to burn people.

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THIS IS NOT SPARTA! *pulls him out of the hole*

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Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

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In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

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what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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Q. Why Did The Blond Have The Biggest Tits In The Third Grade? A. Because She Was 21

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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knock knock who's there? the milk man the milk man who? the milk man who brings your milk every morning

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

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A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

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What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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Why'd the duck cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The duck.

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A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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