Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning.

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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Mama Bear and Papa Bear were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Bear a choice of which parent to live with. "Do you want to live with your mother?" the judge asks. "No! She beats me." answers the baby bear. "OK, then you can live with your father." says the judge. "No! He beats me too!" cries baby bear. So Baby Bear was placed in a foster home.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

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1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.

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What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

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Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

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Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

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Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

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ask me if I'm a tree.. are you a tree? no.

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

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how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

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A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

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Why did Gus go to the HC? Because he got high off his ass.

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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