~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

the old man fell down the stairs and broke his leg, he then went to the hospital and got a cast. later that day he went home and ate soup

Man 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Man2: Are you a tree? Man1: no.

Your grandma's cookies.

Do you know what a third world bathroom smells like? Crap

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

What did the foot say to the other foot? Nothing, because they are feet.

Why did the little girl die Because she was kidnapped by a rapist, and defiled repeatedly, and then to get a ransom from her family the kidnapper slowly pulled out her fingernails and toenails, and sent them to the family the same thing happened with her fingers, toes, hands, feet, arms, legs, teeth, tounge, hair, and eyes, then she died of blood loss after nearly 2 months of torture.

Why did the ginger cross the road? To tell the police that her family had been taken hostage.

Where do snowmen keep their money? Snowmen don't have money

What did the man with Alzheimer's get for Christmas? Happy New Year!

One man's trash is another man's treasure is a horrible way to tell a kid that he's adopted

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

jimmy carr walks into a tax office.

4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

squirrels with massive bonerss

Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? She was a woman.

What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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