I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

A black man walks into a store and buys something.

There once was a man from Madrass Whose balls were made out of brass This was incredibly uncomfortable and embarrassing for him. It also affected his sexual potency and rendered him infertile, Which drastically affected his ability to enter and sustain relationships with women.

what do you call an ocelot with ebola? an ocelot that might die soon.

OBAMA and the DEMOCRATS

What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

Pi = Pie, something everybody likes.

What has legs but may never walk? A Vietam Vet

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

Knock Knock Go Away

why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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