What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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A man walks into a bar and says he has a talking dog. He is then taken to a mental hospital and diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

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"Happy Father's Day!" said the little boy to the old man. The old man broke out in tears because he had always wanted to be a father.

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my gave me a game i said thank you

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because Your mother said so. Now get a life and get off this website young fellas.

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Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

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Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

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A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

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whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

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The Game

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Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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Old guitars sound like cat's guts

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops