What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

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Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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what do you call a cow? A cow

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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A man walks into a bar.... no wait! It's a horse! A man walks into a horse...

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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How many hamburgers can a grizzly bear eat? Maybe 6.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops