So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved.

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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A man walks into a bar... "Ouch"

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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why was the black man forced to sit at the back of the bus ? it was a busy day.

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What's the cookie monster's favorite kind of cookie? Oreos

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How many guys does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

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What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to.

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Why do gay people go to the beach on memorial? idk im not gay

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

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Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops