Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

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Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

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What did Frieza say to Vegeta after killing his parents? "I killed your parents."

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How many penguins does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Penguins cannot screw in lightbulbs because they have wings instead of fingers or opposable thumbs, as humans do.

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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Why did Chad find dead people all over the playground? Ask him, it's not like he's pointing a gun at your face.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

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What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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The Holocaust.

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roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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Nicolas Cage

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Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

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What did the heart attack victim say? Call 911, I'm having chest pains. yeah, your anti-jokes are this funny....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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