9

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats in common with a rat and an apple? neither of them are a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I got shot once it hurt a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people, and are a nation and ethnoreligious group originating in the Israelites or Hebrews of the Ancient Near East. A pizza on the other hand is an Italian dish made up of cheese, bread sauces and multiple toppings.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Hey, there are 206 bones in the human body, would you like 1 more? ;) If you are referring to your penis, that is made of tissue, so it is not an extra bone. And no, I would not like your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a plummer angry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -10

try slamming a revolving door

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops