one day i went to bed

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

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I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

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a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber's talent.

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what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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why did the husband always work late nights? he needed the extra hours to provide for his family

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What would Jesus do? Do? You mean like do it? You have a dirty mind.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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Woman's rights

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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bees knees

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

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Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

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O'Malley, an Irishman; Adam, a Jew; and Patrick, a gay man, walk into a bar. Oh crap. I just outed Patrick.

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Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I t was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops