Why did the baker have brown hands: Because he was black

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

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Whats even funnier than watching two black guys with guns attempting to shoot people Just about everything

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

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Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

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roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

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Roses are red violets are blue i heart my toilet Becuase it holds all my POO!!!!!!!!

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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So this guy is driving down the road and he is going real slow, he was going so slow in fact he wasn't even moving, because he was dead.

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

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Roses are red, However, they can also be other colours, such as white, pink or yellow.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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A man walking on a beach looks into the surf and sees a beautiful oil lamp floating to shore. Wondering who in the heck uses oil lamps anymore, he picks it up, sees a bit of crust on the side, and rubs it clean. Just then a burst of smoke comes out of the lamp, and a genie floats out and stands before the man. "Oh master, thank you for releasing me from the lamp. In thanks, I grant to you one wish. Anything you ask for, it will be true," said the genie. "One wish? What happened to three," asked the man. "Dude, don't push it. We're in a recession. So what's your wish?" "OK. OK. I ... I... I WISH I WAS RICH!" screamed the man. The genie folded his arms, blinked twice, scratched his nose, nodded his head, and spun in a circle twice. "And it is SO!" he cried out. The man looked at himself, looked at the genie, but nothing seemed to have changed. "WTF, genie. Am I rich?" The genie replied, "Well no. You said, 'I wish I was rich.' I made you rich... ten years ago. You were rich. Now you're not. You used the indicative mood 'was.' If you wanted it to become true now in the present, you should have used the subjunctive mood 'were.'"

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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