A black man, a white man, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The bartender kicks them out because he doesn't have time for another crappy joke; as the bar is very crowded that night.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

i have to pee out my ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?" The horse cannot understand what the bartender said and instead finds it threatening, so it has a complete spasm and wrecks the whole bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the difference between a woman and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is the most common term for adult females of the human race.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the man start living on the street? he lost his job, his wife left him, and had his identity stolen.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

My tractor broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A muslim and a jew meet each other in a dark ally...... they give each other strange looks because they are both in a dark ally.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why is 6 afraid of 7? This is 7, if you do everything I say, 6 will live.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

69

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Want to here a joke? The First Amendment.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops