Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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What's a black person's favorite thing to eat? Food.

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Vicky is my best friend.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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U know what they say about big shoes? Big socks

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Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

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wanna hear a joke? no.

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Why can't men give birth? Because men do not not have the reproductive organs required to give life to a new born child.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

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Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

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Why couldn't the Asian drive? He was blind

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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