hot diggity dog

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what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

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What's worse then one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse then two bee stings? The Holocaust . What worse then the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

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Two gay men walk into a bar. Holding hands.

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What do you do when your phone goes off in class? Stay behind after class whilst the teacher takes off his pants and tells you do bend over a desk. This is your punishment.

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Q: What is a laptop that sings? A: A Dell

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What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

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Are you a tree

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

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A horse dies and goes to heaven. He wonders why there aren't any atheists around.

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia Poem make YOU!

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Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

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I just found out i have cancer.

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Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

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I was thinking... Love conquers all right? Remember the epic crying video? Satan: Because... Some where deep inside... I still love you... God:BUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAUuuuaaaahhh... (Partially invisible effect hand of Satan pats God on the back) The universe is at peace with no opposing forces and I am Nerometal, not that asshole that claims to have one fist and is the leader of some sect, I am and will always be the original Moralman, my name simply happens to be Nero, and thats it, so I am not dissing the bible, why would I none of my business literally, but if love can be tha powerful eh?

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Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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