Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

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Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

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Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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A christian, a Jew, and a muslim walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have a good night because no one knows they are all of different religions.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one being irish and the other chinese. now they both happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china, where as the chinese man had not committed any crime.

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Why do you always find a dead baby in the last place you look? Because once you've found it, you stop looking.

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You see how lame this is?

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You know what's funny? Clowns.

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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Why did the sheep cry? Because it contracted cancer

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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Mirror mirror on the wall. Why can't I see?

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Rachel not blowing Robert.

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what did the dirty homeless girl get for Christmas -A DILDO

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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