What did the Egyptian helicopter do when it went into the pyramid? Exploded.

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

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A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

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Why is it that we don't eat clowns? Because in most Western countries cannibalism is illegal.

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What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Your mom's your dad's wife. Except when she's not.

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donald................duck for president

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A slutty deer walks into a bar she then comes out and says wow i cant believe i blew 30 bucks

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What's the opposite of stupid? diputs

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

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Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

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knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

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The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

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what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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