Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

Q: Why can't Helen Keller have a baby? A: Because she is dead. ...I IS HORNY!

Why did the kid fall off his swing? Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

full house

Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? I'm not sure, he could not unwrap them.

Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

What did the martian say to the other martian when he saw a fire hydrant? "Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!"

rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

Josh Moran sticks polish sausage up his ear and moves it back and forth while squeezing his balls until they rupture.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

Mormons having fun.

Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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