What did bob order at pizza hut? Pizza

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was a registered 6 offender

yolo mother f-uckaaaa

Q: How do you stop a baby from crying? A: You hit it with brick.

What's funny about using a shake weight? It resembles masturbating with a penis.

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

hey i just met you.... and this might just sound crazy but i have a bad case of short term memory .....were we talking????

Pull my finger. Not right now. I'm watching The Price is Right.

Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish, who had a horrible accident with a fishing hook

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Hit by a bus Why did the bus driver drop his coffee? He hit the boy

What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

Knock knock. Come in.

Roses are red Violets are tits I like tits Tits

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

How do you get a kid to shut up? You ducttape his mouth,legs, and arms and throw him in a pit

A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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